


That Lingering Question

by frau_kali



Series: 30 Weeks of Cherik [6]
Category: X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) - Fandom, X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Cuddling & Snuggling, Erik has Issues, Established Relationship, Fluff, Guilt, Love Confessions, M/M, Mansion Fic, Morning After, Post-Movie(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-18
Updated: 2015-04-18
Packaged: 2018-03-23 14:49:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3772258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frau_kali/pseuds/frau_kali
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Erik still loved his mornings with Charles, but now they felt more bittersweet.</p>
<p>(For week 6 - naked cuddling.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	That Lingering Question

**Author's Note:**

> This is another one I wrote ages ago. It was also posted (without being proof read) to tumblr for a few months, back when I wanted to do this challenge daily. Posting this one this week to give myself some leeway to work on my Treat Yo Self challenge fic, which I will hopefully finish on time xD

Erik used to love mornings with Charles; waking up to feel their usually naked flesh pressed together, a bit sore from the previous evening (thinking how sore Charles must've been always sent a thrill through him) and always so, so warm. These days, despite most of the above still being true, mornings with Charles felt more bittersweet.

Because, of course, Erik could be leaving that morning. Or the next. He was never certain; typically he relied on what the newspaper reported to determine how long he could be away from the Brotherhood for, though other times he knew when he was going to leave. On those mornings he tended to slip out before Charles woke up, sure that Charles already knew he was going to be leaving. Every goodbye killed him, and he wanted instead to avoid seeing the look on Charles' face whenever he left, regardless of how cowardly that made him.

He did not know if this morning would be one where he left, but he did know he would rather it not be. Not when he could stay here, tangled up with Charles for a little while longer, especially not when he wanted to make him breakfast. He always had to do it at least once when he was here, usually more if he could.

Charles lay with his back pressed to Erik's chest, his head under Erik's chin. Erik couldn't even really see his face, but he still looked gorgeous like this. He thought of pushing him onto his back, and kissing down his chest, applying his lips and his teeth to each nipple in turn. Charles' erogenous zones had all shifted upward since his injury, and Erik knew if he did that, he'd have the other man reduced to a moaning, crying wreck in no time at all.

Tempting, but there was something just as good about laying here like this, pressed together. He liked to watch Charles sleep, to see him so peaceful, safe here in Erik's arms.

Still, Erik couldn't stop himself from sliding a hand along Charles' side, starting from his waist and moving upward. He knew precisely where the feeling stopped, had learned every part of Charles all over again since Washington, and once more knew just how to please him. For his part, Charles was quite skilled himself, his hands and mouth were as good as Erik remembered, and sometimes he employed his telepathy in the most wonderful of ways.

Things were better, but... well, Erik didn't think the guilt would ever disappear. And he felt it now, even as he leaned down to kiss Charles' shoulder softly, and then to bury his face there. He had done this to Charles, made him like this, and nothing he could ever do could take that back. He wondered sometimes why Charles even allowed him this closeness, much less still enjoyed his company. He wished more than anything that he could go back and change how things turned out in Cuba, or at least make it so he hadn't abandoned his friend so harshly.

“Erik...” Charles whispered, groaning slightly as he stirred. Erik supposed he must've been thinking rather loudly, as he recognized the chiding in Charles' voice, even when he was sleepy. They had been over this before; Charles wanted him to forgive himself. It had been five years since Washington, and Charles had forgiven him, Erik knew. Or at least forgiven him for the injury, which he knew all along had been an accident. The rest he was less certain of, no matter what Charles said.

Kissing along his shoulder, Erik reached Charles' ear, and kissed him there, too. A tendril of pleasure shot down Charles' spine, which he shared with Erik. Their minds were wrapped up in each other quite a lot these days, though Charles had taken a bit of time before he'd gotten inside Erik's head again.

Charles breathed a sigh, finding Erik's hand and joining their fingers together. “Careful, my friend, unless you'd like to start something,” Charles whispered, nuzzling his head against Erik's neck before he shifted back a little so Erik could properly see his face.

“Would you like me to?” Erik asked, already knowing the answer. _We could stay in bed all day_ , he added, mentally, the thought joined by a few images of what he'd like to do to Charles. But again, he already knew the answer.

Charles laughed, rich and beautiful, blue eyes shining while he gaze up at Erik. “That certainly sounds lovely, Erik, but it is Monday, and I can't imagine my students would appreciate missing my classes.”

“They're kids, Charles,” Erik said, pulling him closer like he never wanted to let go. Right now, he really didn't. “They'll be grateful.” _I could melt the door lock, and keep you here all day, make you scream so loud you would have to make everyone forget they knew what it sounded like to hear their professor beg for it._ He breathed a sigh at the very thought, kissing along Charles' jaw. _Mine._

Charles tilted his head back, eyes closed and red lips open, a small sound escaping him, the sort Erik rather loved. _Erik..._ Even mentally, Charles sounded so very tempted. _I'm still yours, even without all that._

He met Erik's eyes then, and though he didn't need to say it, Erik recognized the silent plea in his expression, the one that said _Stay. Please, Erik. Please stay with me._

Instead of responding, or acknowledging it, Erik leaned down to press their lips together. He easily licked his way into Charles' willing mouth, their tongues immediately pressed together as they both groaned into it. Charles' longing for Erik, for him to stay, to have him, for them to do everything together bled through their mental connection, and Erik wished he could do everything he'd just described.

He pulled away, and both of them breathed deeply, still cuddled together, pressed closed and touching every where they could. “Next time, schatz,” Erik whispered. He smoothed some of Charles' hair aside, caressing his cheek while Charles ran his own hand through Erik's hair and just smiled at him.

_I still love you, you know,_ Charles' mental voice whispered, carrying affection with it. _I know you think you don't deserve it, Erik, but I do._

Erik stared at him, momentarily taken aback. He always was when Charles said that to him, mentally or otherwise. It had been a while, had taken time for Charles to heal ( _from what you did to him_ , Erik's mind supplied) and though he knew Charles would always care about him, he hadn't expected to hear those words again. It was one thing to rekindle an old sexual relationship, to meet occasionally at the park and play chess, or just simply talk about nothing particularly important. But for all that to mean they could still love each other, even after everything, Erik had never been that hopeful.

He smiled sadly. _I love you, too, Charles._ He tried to keep the thought of how he didn't deserve it quiet, but the denial he felt from Charles' end made it clear he didn't succeed. Thankfully, though, apart from the extra affection pushed toward him, Charles said nothing of it. They'd had that argument before so many times, they were both quite weary from it now.

Again he leaned in to kiss Charles, a biting, bruising thing that lasted longer than the first time. They were both breathing heavily by the end of it, and Charles looked utterly gorgeous with his swollen red lips. It made Erik want to _wreck_ him.

Charles laughed at that. “And you call me insatiable,” he whispered, tucking his head under Erik's chin and closing his eyes.

“Just because I might be, doesn't mean you aren't,” Erik replied, head resting on the pillow now. His hand returned to Charles' arm, this time racing patterns over his skin.

For some time they laid like this, mingling in each other's heads, enjoying the feeling of their mutual closeness. And then Charles breathed a sigh and spoke again: “Erik, I hope you know that when you're ready to stay, I won't send you away. I'd very much like you here.”

The words both made Erik's heart skip a beat (he had always assumed, but Charles had never asked him to stay before, he'd only looked like he wanted to) and filled him with a sadness he wanted to shove away but couldn't. Still, he lifted his eyebrows. “When? Isn't that a little arrogant of you?” Erik tried to make his tone light, even though he knew Charles felt his conflicting emotions.

Charles tilted his head, pulling back enough to look Erik in the face. “I have hope for you, my friend. Maybe it will be a long while, but I'm sure that one day you'll come back to me, we'll find some way past these differences, grow old together, and make each other furious, but you'll be here, and you'll be safe.”

Erik wanted to call him a fool, to tell him he was being ridiculous for assuming he would just give up his cause and come back to Charles, maybe even come to his way of thinking. Although he supposed he should give Charles some credit for recognizing they were always going to have disagreements, even strong ones.

Instead of arguing, Erik just ran his fingers through Charles' hair. “You can hope, old friend, but I can't stay.”

Charles nodded, even as Erik felt his sadness through the link. “I know.” He said softly, closing his eyes and just pressing himself against Erik again.

The next morning Erik left, dressing quickly and exciting the house and the grounds before Charles was even awake. He knew it was cowardly, not to say goodbye, or to face the sadness he was surely inflicting on his dearest friend.

When they met again, this time at Erik's favourite hotel in the city, they did not speak of Charles' hope, and Charles didn't ask Erik to stay. They both knew Charles would never stop hoping, though, and Erik sometimes, secretly, caught himself thinking, wishing, that one day things would be different.

_Fin._


End file.
